I chortled silently as I read the last post, afraid that more than a whisper would draw my hawk-like mother's attention; the prospect of her frolicking over to the computer only to discover I was laughing at my own wit was not particularly inviting. I suppose that, reading of my mother's bird-inspired tendencies as you just have, you would guess that I was referring back to the 3rd grade writing example of a simile: "eyes like a hawk." Alas, no, I wish my mother had eyes like a hawk -- it would've prevented that wretched week of grumpiness she experienced roughly 4 months ago whenst trying to accustom herself to contacts. A failed attempt, I might add, and the 5 days in between the Monday that our possibly gay eye doctor prescribed soft contact lenses and the Saturday when she decided they made her eyes too dry and irritating was maybe a week I should've gone camping.

And I hate camping, and I hate tents, and I love s'mores but I could settle for them in my backyard -- so the fact that I considered the sport of living like a caveman is a testimony to the overall enjoyability of that week.

However, the idea of settling down in the prickly underbrush in the sad excuse for a sleeping bag in which father persists in leaving every pair of worn black socks he owns is no less than enticing to my sister ("She-who-must-not-be-named"-- I am a Reader's-Digest savvy anti-phisher and I really couldn't stand to blow my cover). "She-who.." and I had long ago resolved our differences in taste, but in the week surrounding the Perseus meteor showers, I am constantly being bombarded with requests to grace her and my mother with my presence out on the lawn at dusk.

Living in a small town as we do, light rays and pollution make for a suspiciously nonexistent meteor shower -- a fact that is largely responsible for dreadfully frequent trips to the beach, the dessert, the country. Apparently the Perseus in the country is a wildly active event, there being no diesel-guzzling fumes to shower their potent breath throughout the sky or monstrous skyscrapers to flood the world with light. I detect a potential display of the Northern Lights, what with the green sludgy gluck of SUVS and the luminescence of a million 120 watt light bulbs. It's a wonder that Japanese Tourists even bother with expensive trips to Alaska when they could view a mini-production of the Aurora Borealis from my backyard, totally free-of-charge unless they serve me raw egg.

I know I was going to say something about shooting stars, that's why I brought this all up in the first place. That was an awfully long time ago I'm afraid, and since then I've plumb forgot the undoubtedly sly and witty comment I would've made. Ah yes, and as to the deletion of this blog, this is the deal: I'm really dreadfully tired of it, what with its aesthetically criminal layout and blurbs that were funny like two years ago and stuff, but I have a super-soft spot in my heart for killing 40-110 minutes once a month or so online posting something really stupid, and I can't bare to give it up.

So I'm going to create a new blog, and possibly link to this one on it or something. I'm not going to now of course, it would all be too sudden. Sooner or later, though, I expect.

Wow, BTW! I just spell-checked this bugger, and the the numbers have soared surprisingly high since my last post -- 17 misspelled words in these few paragraphs and counting! It's forever calling me on "whenst," but I really just am so attatched to that word, or collection of letters, or whatever it is. Why the heck is it underlining "could've," anyway? Ever heard of a 2-in-1 deal, 'cause Walgreens certainly has! Everyone I know who knows anything about getting pissed off about spam knows the word "phisher," too -- including the ever-reliable Reader's Digest! Really, if we can't trust the magazine just one step down in brilliance from AARP, what in God's name can we trust? Okay, I'll admit that my first attempt of "aesthetically" looked suspiciously like "athletically," but perhaps I was alluding to the sporty symptoms of white on green!